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{"id":2943,"date":"2020-08-23T15:09:37","date_gmt":"2020-08-23T15:09:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lifeabirdseyeview.com\/?p=2943"},"modified":"2020-08-23T15:41:59","modified_gmt":"2020-08-23T15:41:59","slug":"woman-in-the-mirror","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/lifeabirdseyeview.com\/2020\/08\/woman-in-the-mirror.html\/","title":{"rendered":"(Wo)man In The Mirror"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

\u2018I’m starting with the woman in the mirror<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I’m asking her to change her ways<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And no message could have been any clearer<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you want to make the world a better place<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Take a look at yourself, and then make a change.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I love these lyrics. (I used to love Jacko too, but that was before he went looking for him<\/em>self and happened to find what he was searching for in the underpants of young boys. Allegedly, I should add – don\u2019t sue me, Latoya). <\/p>\n\n\n\n

But isn\u2019t now, 2020, the most fucked-up, melon-twisting year of our lives so far, a good time to look in the mirror? Time to take stock of our lives in general? You might not be able to make the world a better place, but you can always work on making your <\/em>world a better place. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Since starting this new blog If You Booze, You Lose, documenting my self-improvement journey to alcohol-free living, I\u2019ve heard gossipy rumblings on the grapevine that I must be a full-blown alcoholic, said with the slightest whiff of schadenfreude. I\u2019m sure none of you\u00a0are\u00a0losing sleep over this little conundrum, but for the purpose of clarity: I\u2019m not an alcoholic. Not even close. (If you read last week\u2019s blog found\u00a0HERE<\/a>, you\u2019ll see that I explain exactly how I\u2019d categorise myself). Haters, I\u2019m sorry to disappoint you\u00a0huns.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There hasn\u2019t been any dramatic catalyst for this lifestyle change; no spectacular fall from grace. I didn\u2019t get arrested; the bank aren\u2019t threatening to repossess my house. No, I\u2019m not about to be made homeless; you won\u2019t need to avert your gaze as I ask if you can \u201cspare any change please?\u201d as I sit cross-legged outside the Sevenoaks Waitrose, my grubby palms pressed together like the praying emoji (I\u2019m nearer Aldi actually, but those shoppers are generally as skint as I am, as a lone-living retail-working divorcee). No, I\u2019m just a perfectly imperfect mid-life human being on a quest to be the fittest, happiest, most mentally agile version of myself. That\u2019s it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

But then I got to thinking: why are<\/em> some people so quick to throw shade on my parade, trash-talking my public declaration of discontent with my drinking habits? Dissing my endeavours. What is it that\u2019s made them ask other, closer, (better!) mates of mine if I\u2019m spiralling into the abyss? Genuine concern? Or maybe…fear<\/em>? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Perhaps my admission has unsettled something buried deep in their gut, something they\u2019ve pushed down, down, down – deep below Saturday\u2019s Sauvignon and the greasy kebab that followed, deeper than the Sunday morning hangover cure  comprising a fry-up and emergency diet Coke. This thing they\u2019ve buried is so deep and uncomfortable that it\u2019s given them acid reflux, a stomach ulcer, and is now finally being expelled from their gassy rear-end…and into my pals\u2019 DMs. No wonder they\u2019re talking shit – it\u2019s been brewing for long enough. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

This thing that\u2019s bothering them about me giving up alcohol? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I reckon it\u2019s their own deep-seated unease. Unease at their own <\/em>lifestyle choices. Rather than reach out and admit their own failings, it\u2019s easier to dismiss mine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s ok because she\u2019s just a weak-willed alchy. I\u2019m<\/em> nothing like that…\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n

By telling themselves I have a serious problem, their own problem seems smaller, more manageable. How do I know this? Because I\u2019ve done it myself. Not necessarily out loud, but I\u2019ve certainly told myself in my head. I\u2019m not as bad as that. <\/em>It\u2019s much easier to run with this narrative than confront the issue, head on. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ve looked in the mirror and decided a few tweaks are necessary, having caught sight of the bulging boiled-egg eyes the morning after, and the tell-tale half-drunk bottle of red in the background. (See, if I was really <\/em>an alcoholic that bottle would be empty \ud83d\ude09). But by doing so this openly it\u2019s as though I\u2019ve swivelled that mirror round and held it up to you, too. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Do you like what you see? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

If so, sweet. No Pepto Bismol needed for you. If not, what is your grumbling gut trying to tell you? Instead of ducking out of sight of the mirror, why not face it and join me on this journey? Perhaps we can bolster one another. I won\u2019t bite, honest. (Well, not unless you get the absinthe out – that shit does strange things to people). If I\u2019ve got a resting bitch face it\u2019s usually because I\u2019m thinking. (I don\u2019t smile and think at the same time, that\u2019d be like applying mascara with my mouth closed.) <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I dare you to stand in front of the mirror and ask yourself to make a change. Look at yourself; really see <\/em>yourself. Not just when you\u2019re absent-mindedly brushing your teeth of an evening whilst rerunning the events of the day through your mind like a silent movie. Clear your mind and do it properly. Look past the face you show to the world, the bravado. Look into your eyes. Look within, into your soul. Are you truly happy, at peace with yourself? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because unease, that deep-seated anxiety, or should I say the hang<\/em>-xiety that comes with regular alcohol or drug use, or any addiction for that matter (food, gambling, sex) leads to disease. Dis-ease. Not being at ease in and with your self. What starts out as fun gradually drains your energy and dims your light. You\u2019re brighter, sharper, funnier and better company without it. You don\u2019t even need it. It\u2019s taken me a long time to really comprehend that fact.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Life is a game of snakes and ladders, full of ups and downs. We are all players in this incomprehensible race, hurtling at speed towards the finish line: death. Now that\u2019s one competition nobody wants to win. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Old habits die hard. So do addicts. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s time to make that change. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Day 15<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Sam x<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Fancy reading my back-story before you go any further? You can find my other blogs at:<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

www.ifyouboozeyoulose.blogspot.com<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

www.costaricachica1.blogspot.com<\/a><\/strong>
www.samgoessolo.blogspot.com<\/a><\/strong>
www.mummymission.blogspot.com<\/a><\/strong>
www.worldwidewalsh.blogspot.com<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Follow me:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Twitter: @SamanthaWalsh76<\/a> (lifeabirdseyeview)<\/strong>
Facebook: 
@lifeabirdseyeview<\/a><\/strong>
Instagram: 
@lifeabirdseyeview<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u2018I’m starting with the woman in the mirror I’m asking her to change her ways And no message could have been any clearer If you want to make the world a better place Take a look at yourself, and then make a change.\u2019 I love […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2949,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[536,533,980],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"\n(Wo)man In The Mirror - 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